Vermillion No Sekai

It's been a while since I last blogged, so here I am, posting about an actual truth that has been approaching the world with no sign, therefore passing by unnoticed.

Technology, children, and parents; past, present, and future.

We currently live in a world with Technology that advances constantly. Adds more stress to our lives, sometimes it is useful, sometimes its advance should be stopped, and sometimes, its advance should be accelerated. Regardless of what is is done, it is time to take extreme measures to what people do with technology, thereby it's time to slap parents a cup of today's technology. As a matter of fact, we are not in the 70's - 80's anymore. Technology won't stop, therefore it is time to do some harsh changes to peoples' lifestyles, specially with technologies that involve communication, such as the internet and mobile cellphones. Those who have kids, and were born in around the 60's or a bit later, you must understand that you can't raise your children the way you were raised, because just thanks to technology, those decades cannot be compared to today's world, both lifestyle-wise and technology-wise.

I have no idea if you have noticed - you should have, otherwise you just don't go out enough - but if you have children, there's a high chance that you don't play with them the say way your parents played with you back when you were a kid. Probably I am doing a lame generalization here, but I am sure it's true. In the past years, IT jobs have been increasing, and those demand a high knowledge of computers, regardless of what field you are in, and even companies that don't have much to do with IT now require you to be more in contact with your company. Do you understand why you bought your Blueberry a while ago? It's rather obvious; most people check their mail more frequently than playing with their children. That is, if you are a parent you should remember the times where you could work out with your parents, or play sports with them, and had a lot of recreational activities and such events with them. Now you are parent, and what exactly are you doing with your children? Probably, playing videogames with him/her, and if your child is a teen, you may even be talking with him/her via IM services right now (yes, it does happen). It is safe to assume that more parents play more videogames with their children nowadays than sports, either because with the constant increase of technology, jobs demand more communication with the companies (your sweet Blackberry is an artifact for that) and have to be in constant contact with them, or because technology has given you a nice, simpler door to be with your children, which by all means, it is really a lame option to go for. I am not saying it is bad to play videogames with your children, I am saying you should also do more recreational activities with them. Few are the parents that still organize camping vacations with their children to be in contact with nature, but unfortunately, even if you were raised with nature, it is very probable you can't live without your netbook nowadays. Its sad to see how parents are now recurring to videogames to be with their children. They don't even take a lot of time to play, although, there are also parents who have legit reasons to play videogames with their children, as real entertainment, nevertheless, a real parent will not spend all the time with their children in front of a TV (although I have to admit, I would have loved if I could have played Super Smash Bros. With my dad, my mom, and my brother, all of us together... But that's another story for another time).

I mean seriously. Ever heard of the iPhone Mom? Videogames and technology for entertainment purposes should just be another option rather than an item on a checklist when you play with your child. If I was that mother, I would certainly put the freaking iPhone away, and go and play something with the child; doesn't matter if I have to play with lame Sesame Streets, everything is better than using technology as an easy escape in my honest opinion.



Another thing that I absolutely hate is that, even though parents know how to use modern technology, they don't know what risks they bring to today's lifestyles. In the 70's - 80's decades, you really didn't have to worry too much, if at all, about your children seeing children they didn't have to see because the technological entertainment that existed in those days was probably limited to arcades and movies. Not to mention, there were probably some people that followed the rules, and even though there were the arcades, the 'normal' kind of entertainment was still to be with your children out doors. With current increase of videogames, the internet, and others, it is time to take measures that weren't needed long ago. I am not exactly suggesting to keep your children away of technology, I am saying you have to take drastic measures to make sure your children are safe while they use technology, for a lifetime. This kind of measures really involve a brutal kind of shift in your lifestyle for both you, your spouse, and your children. And do trust me, if you are a parent right now, you really wouldn't have expected to see so many changes, because as a matter of fact, if you want a safe life with your children and yourself with technology, neither you or your children can have the same lifestyle you had in your childhood, because with the internet and certain videogames, children are now more exposed to life itself. Remember that teens have en enviable access to pornography that you wish you had when you were a teen, and because of that, you should be completely aware that there are explicit and pornographic adds in many websites, doesn't matter if they are aimed at children. You also have to be prepared, because your children will want and will have a cellphone when they are probably younger than 8 (something I am really against, but unfortunately in today's world, it is a must). Also don't forget that the internet connects you to everyone out there - predators, Obama himself, terrorists, your friends, family members, everyone, you just don't notice - so having a close look to the websites you and your children visit is a must. Neither forget that depressed teenagers and childrens now have the ability to use the internet as an escape route where they can create their own world they enjoy and be happy. Likewise with videogames, excessively depressed kids are going to play them more frequently than others. Before, these children didn't have many escape routes, but they would get cured anyways. Now, with this new worlds, it's hard to get them out of their caves to send them to psychologists. Getting viruses in a computer is also something to worry about, and not exactly because they can mess your machine completely. Do you see why you need to have the brutal swift of lifestyles now? If yes, keep reading. If not, keep reading anyways, you are going to find out.

I will start mentioning what videogames can do in your life, and in your children life as well.

First off, there are arguments saying that they can influence people to do bad things, such as committing crimes.

Before I continue, I must say that those arguments are discussed and there's no research behind it to support any claims. Some people say they do, and others say videogames simply can't induce the people's subconscious. Because of the nature of the arguments and the topic in hand is quite controversial, I will state my point of view: I am in between. Some people are induced by the videogames, and others are not. It simply makes sense and not everyone has the same level of mental control regardless of age.

Now, I don't know about you, but I certainly hate realistic videogames with a bunch of killing and blood, drug dealing and drunk characters, and so on. That doesn't mean there are people that do enjoy this kind of games, and there's no problem in that. Games like the Grand Theft Auto series have all that, and there are healthy people that enjoy them and are not hm, 'brainwashed' by them, however it doesn't mean that people will want to blow a school bully's head with an axe after getting a similar idea from a realistic game (that doesn't have to be exactly from the GTA series). That goes in the life of adults and teens. In the case of younger children (aged 12 and below), there is a high chance that they will be traumatized by such events, and if I have to more pinpointed, I used to get very scared of the 2D blood in the Mortal Combat game for the SNES back in the 90's, imagine how much more I would be scared if I saw this 3D blood with very realistic images!
And that's not all. If you are a teen right now, or simply a parent that also likes videogames (but they are not your life) there probably have been times were you loved a videogames too much, that you would rage if someone distracted you in the last boss and made you lose your last life on it. Sometimes even losing a final battle without external influences has probably made you rage and hit something hard. But let's be honest, you wouldn't kill your 17 months old daughter because she unplugged the electricity of your Xbox, or would you? Nowadays there are people that worry about parents killing their children over a stupid videogame, whereas in the aforementioned decades, you wouldn't have to worry about that, unless you knew someone who was an arcade addict, if even that.
And I am not finished even yet. Remember you don't go outside as much as you did in your childhood, and playing videogames has many negative side effects when played in excess. Many parents don't know this (who would bother in reading the 'WARNING' manual of a new videogame system, when they use complex vocabulary words, and have the tiniest font size in history?), including my own. I remember playing a bit over 3 hours a day of videogames and luckily, I didn't get any kind of seizures, but what about the others? Do they even know what is happening to them? While there is no proof that videogames cause epilepsy out of the blue, it is indeed a fact that photosensitive children can suffer epilepsy attacks. That is, if your children got a terrible headache when you took him a picture with flash enabled, then certainly it shouldn't be playing videogames. But how many parents actually know that? They were playing soccer at that age, not videogames, so unless they read manuals and are very updated, they are not going to know about this. Also if the simple hobby starts to become an addiction, then it will cause isolation of the real world. Obesity is also possible because of the lack of exercise (for starters, the Wii actually doesn't help you to lose weight).

Now that you know how videogames can be negative, it is time for you to know how the internet is dangerous as well.

Like I mentioned before, when you are connected to the internet, you are connected with absolutely everyone that is using it at the same as you, you just don't see them or interact with them unless you have the tools.
The internet is easily a new way to 'kill boredom'. There are some websites that offer simple games to help kill time. The internet also offers an impressive wide array of information for any kind of people. But this information could be false, and the flash games could bring viruses (yes, it happens). The internet also offers messaging services and social websites like forums, blogs, the never ending Social Networking websites, electronic mail, and so on. The latter specially, are the ones you should really be careful of, both you and your children. This kind of websites can, and do have, predators online, waiting for your children to come online and bite them in the moment they would less expect it.

The Internet is an incredible source of information. Sick and tired of your neighbors? It won't take you more than 5 minutes to find a tutorial to make bombs on the internet. It is sad, because in the 70's it really took you ages and it was hard to get your hands in this kind of information. With the internet your cross borders. What is illegal in the US may not be illegal in other countries. Unfortunately, nowadays you can put your hands on child pornography easily, have easy contact with terrorists, and find illegal drug dealers without knocking your head on the telephone guide. Your children and teens also have access to this information. Many parents nowadays may not be aware that their children are getting rid by selling marijuana, or worse, they may not know that they are posting their nude pictures over the internet, which makes them easy targets for social desolation, and depending on the case, easy victims for predators. Many times, the act of posting your nudity on the internet may be a mere act of openess and sense of freedom, which in my humble opinion doesn't matter, as long as they share with a group of people they trust. Things will get bad when the bad people get their hands on the pictures.

Also children don't know much about how much information they can give to strangers. But unfortunately, even if they release little information, every computer has an address, called IP address, unique to each computer, and while some computers have more than IP address, they don't have an infinite amount of different selections for them, so tracking a person using an IP address is possible, otherwise, many people wouldn't have been arrested for using P2P programs in the 90's. The moment you are connected, some websites can and will connect your IP addresses, most of the time with no harmful purposes, but the internet is huge, and there is always someone willing to get your IP address for mischievous purposes.

Now, if you are a "modern parent" and followed technology till the end of the 90's, you probably have seen viruses that could screw your computer completely. Now, if you download a virus and it destroys your computer, you should actually be glad. Viruses have evolved in their ways. Before, viruses were creations of people wanting to show their skills destroying computers. Now, viruses are there to steal your private information. So if your child played a flash on the computer last night and the FBI knocks your door for spending money you don't have, don't be too surprised about it. Both viruses and Social Engineering are methods to steal private information. See things this way. I have been on this website for 3 years now, almost 4. PROBABLY, some of my dearest friends on this site have been thefts that are befriending me to get my passwords and other info, even if it takes them years. The same can happen with children.

The social websites and games are also dangerous. You can find predators, and people who will personify others. If you have added your boss to Facebook ask yourself this question: is that REALLY your boss? It could be, it could be not.
But for your children, the predators are the BIG problem. There's a popular game called Blub Penguin. And I have seen all kind of profane language there (yes, I have been there, but just to see my cousin play it because in those days, she really liked it). Many times, they were simple teenagers goofing around out of boredom (which, it isn't exactly a good thing), but other times, it really looked like there was a predator there. That scared me. Your children interact with many people on the internet when they use it, and many times you don't know when it could be a predator. Some are too dumb and make it obvious, but others could use Social Engineering techniques, and your children could probably give personal information to them blindly.



So how exactly do you make sure your children (and yourself) are using correctly? There are some simple measures:

For Videogames:

First simply, make sure the game is appropriate for children. Even if your child is ready for explicit content, it may be a wise not to show him that kind of stuff.
Obviously, children want to play what is popular, and many things their friends play may not be appropriate. Though they may try to fool you so you can buy their game, there is a little something that will really help you decided if the game is right or not for your children, that many if not all people ignore: the ESRB.



Using the ESRB symols is easy and straightforward. Check their to learn about the symbols and what ages and audiences they represent.

Also I am sure there's no need to say this, but do check every now and then how much they play and if they show any signals of lack of sociability skills.

For the internet:

First of all, MONITOR EVERYTHING YOUR CHILD DOES; according on its age, that is. If your child is very young, you can go around and just install Kidoz browser, a browser for small children with just safe images and no text, and also has filters to prevent access to a forbidden site.



But what if your children are a bit older and need more access, with all the risks outside? Well first, you simply can't strip the internet off of their lives until they get older. When I was saying a brutal change of lifestyles I wasn't kidding. When you were young, you probably didn't know how babies were born until you turned 14 if necessary. If you want to keep your children safe, it is time to give them "the talk" a bit earlier, than you. Information is a must, and explaining things is absolutely important. Be with them when they first use the internet. Install Firewalls, and other kind of filters. Make sure you prevent unecessary pop ups to appear to your child (Firefox with tools like adblock plus could help) as they could have porn or other inappropriate content. Monitor monitor monitor. They won't realize its a breach to their privacy till be in their teens, where they won't need you to monitor them 24/7 while they use the internet.

Others:

You can play with your technology with your children. I myself have used my iPhone to play with my little cousins. They adore a game called FairyFly which has Disney fairies and MyHouse, an app that lets them make their own houses. But I only give them 15 minutes with it. Afterwards, we go outside and play Hide N Seek and whatever other childish game you may think of. Moderation is a must.

Also, I mentioned the cellphone. It is necessary unfortunately. But for the love of God, don't give your kid a last model kind of cellphone. There are special cellphones out there specially for children which only have 4 buttons: call dad, call mom, answer, hung up. That's what you should give them instead of latest models with FM radio and cameras. They won't even need the SMS ability. Just call mom and dad in case something happens. Or the police and others if necessary.



Technology will certainly force you to change your lifestyle with many more ways than the ones described here. If something unexpected happens, there are forums on the internet for troubled parents... Ironically enough. There are also websites (oh the irony again!) dedicated to this and to children security online, which you really should find useful.

Have a nice day and thanks for reading (if you did)!